Howard Cosell: It may very well have been one of the most astonishing events to grace the annals of history. An historic, unprecedented avian biped with the temerity to attempt such an herculean achievement formerly relegated to homo sapien pedestrians is truly a remarkable occurence.
Salvador Dali: The Fish.
Darwin: It was the logical next step after coming down from the trees.
Thomas Dequincy: Because it ran out of opium.
Rene Descartes: It had sufficient reason to believe it was dreaming anyway.
Emily Dickinson: Because it could not stop for death.
Bob Dylan: How many roads must one chicken cross?
TS Eliot: Weialala leia Wallala leialala.
TS Eliot (revisited): Do I dare to cross the road?
Epicurus: For fun.
Paul Erdos: It was forced to do so by the chicken-hole principle.
Ralph Waldo Emerson: It didn't cross the road; it transcended it.
Basil Fawlty: Oh, don't mind that chicken. It's from Barcelona.
Gerald R. Ford: It probably fell from an airplane and couldn't stop its forward momentum.
Freud: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying insecurity.
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