Thursday, 16 May 2013

Silly Jokes – Page 8

Why did the king go to the dentist?
To get his teeth crowned!

"Tell me" said the tourist to the local yokel. "Will this path take me to the main road?"
"No sir!", replied the man. "You'll have to go by yourself!" 

Why are you covered in bruises?
I started to walk through a revolving door and I changed my mind!

How do you prevent a Summer cold?
Catch it in the Winter!

What is the best day of the week to sleep?
Snooze-day!

How many rotten eggs does it take to make a stink bomb?
A phew!

What do cannibals eat for breakfast?
Buttered host!

What holds the sun up in the sky?
Sunbeams!

What does "Maximum" mean?
A very big mother!

What is full of holes but can still hold water?
A sponge!

Why is perfume obedient?
Because it is scent wherever it goes!

Waiter, this soup tastes funny?
Then why aren't you laughing!

What do you get if you cross a US President with a shark?
Jaws Washington!

Why is it not safe to sleep on trains?
Because they run over sleepers!

Why do you keep doing the backstroke?
I've just had lunch and don't want to swim on a full stomach!

How do we know that Joan of Arc was French?
She was maid in France!

Who invented underground tunnels?
A mole!

Why did the clock get sick?
It was run down!

How do you make milk shake?
Give it a good scare!

Do you know the time?
No, we haven't met yet!