Never do card tricks for the group you play poker with.
Be nice to your kids: they'll choose your nursing home.
If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that
you tried.
Ham and Eggs - A day's work for a chicken; a lifetime
commitment for a pig.
Any closet is a walk-in closet if you try hard enough.
I can't get enough minimalism.
Birthdays are good for you - the more you have the longer
you live.
If you think there is good in everybody then you obviously
haven't met everybody.
Am I ambivalent? Well, yes and no.
Is there another word for synonym?
Where do forest rangers go to get away from it all?
I think I'm agnostic, but I haven't decided.
I don't want buns of steel. I want buns of cinnamon.
Do they use sterilized needles for lethal injections?
Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which
one can die.
The colder the x-ray table the more of your body is
required on it.
Some days it's not worth chewing through the straps.
Dyspraxics are people three.
Losing a husband can be hard: in my case it was almost
impossible.
I'd like to have more self-esteem, but I don't deserve
it.
I'm one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous.
What has four legs and an arm? A happy pit bull.
A day without radiation is a day without sunshine.
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