Wednesday, 17 July 2013

How many … to change a light bulb - Page 3

How many Irishmen does it take to screw in a light bulb? Fifteen. One to hold the bulb, and the rest to drink whiskey until the room spins. 

How many roadies does it take to change a light bulb? One two! One two! 

How many beer makers does it take to change a light bulb? About one third less than for a regular bulb. 

How many Valley Girls does it take to change a light bulb? Oh my GOD! Like, manual labor? Gag me with a spoon! For sure. 

How many Amish does it take to change a light bulb? None. They bake pies. 

How many people with ADD does it take to change a light bulb? I just found a new recipe for Egg Salad!

How many safety inspectors does it take to change a light bulb? Four. One to change it, and three to hold the ladder. 

How many Catholics does it take to change a light bulb? Change?

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Sixteen. One to change it, and fifteen to form a support group. 

How many Communists does it take to screw in a light bulb? The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution. 

How many Italians does it take to change a light bulb? Are you callin' my wife a whore?

How many retirees does it take to change a light bulb? One, but it might take all day. 

How many carpenters does it take to change a light bulb? Two, one to hold it, one to hammer it in. 

How many dadaists does it take to change a light bulb? Fish. 

How many paranoids does it take to change a light bulb? WHO WANTS TO KNOW? 

How many Valley Girls does it take to change a light bulb? Oh, Daddy!

How many bodybuilders does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to do it and two to say, "You're looking huge, man!"

How many firemen does it take to change a light bulb? Four, one to change the bulb and three to cut a hole in the roof. 

How many emo kids does it take to change a light bulb? None, they like to cry in the dark.

How many kids on Ritalin does it take to change a light bulb? Hey, let's go ride bikes!

How many Mormons does it take to change a light bulb? None. They let their wives do it.

How many senior citizens does it take to screw in a light bulb? One, but she pays a telemarketer $2000 for the new bulb.