Crazy helpdesk calls - Page 1

Helpdesk: "What kind of computer do you have?" "A white one."

Helpdesk: "Click on the 'My Computer' icon on to the left of the screen."

Customer: "Your left or my left?"

Customer: "I have a huge problem. A friend has put a screensaver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears!"

Helpdesk: "Good day. How may I help you?" Male customer: "Hello, I can't print." Helpdesk: "Would you click on start for me."

Customer: "Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill Gates, you know!"

Helpdesk: "Your password is the small letter 'a' as in apple, a capital letter 'V' as in Victor, and the number '7'."

Customer: "Is that '7' in capital letters?"

Customer: "My monitor did not pass the drop test during our department move. I would like to get another one."

User's new notebook PC has a wireless network card. He loves it - for a day or so, until the battery goes dead. "Did you plug it into a power outlet to charge it?" asks systems administrator. "No," says sales guy impatiently. "It's wireless, why would I?"

User tells support tech that she knocked a key off her laptop. She replaced it, but now it won't work. Tech asks, "is the key loose?" "Not now," user replies. "It was loose, but I fixed it. I used super glue."

Helpdesk: "What does the screen say now.."

Customer: "It says, 'Hit ENTER when ready'."

Helpdesk: "Well?"

Customer: "How do I know when it's ready?"

A lady was putting a credit card into her floppy drive and pulling it out very quickly. I inquired as to what she was doing and she said she was shopping on the internet, and they asked for a credit card number, so she was using the ATM "thingy."

A Dell customer called to say he couldn't get his computer to fax anything. After 40 minutes of trouble-shooting, the tech discovered the man was trying to fax a piece of paper by holding it in front of the monitor screen and hitting the "send" key.

Customer: "I turned on my PC this morning, and the screen is black."

Helpdesk: "Is the monitor on?" Customer: "Yes."

Helpdesk: "OK, turn the monitor off."

Customer: "Oh, wow! It just started working! I wonder what happened?"