Monday, 17 June 2013

Excuses for taking a day off - Page 1

I won't be in today. I'm still drunk from last night.

My car ran out of gas on the way to work. I was pushing it to a gas station and I got a stomach hernia and I have to go to the doctors.

I have a bit of a problem. I got the end of a Q-tip stuck in my ear and have to go to the doctors to get it out.

I can't come to work today because the city is paving my street and I can't get out.

I am sorry but I will be unable to come in to work today. My agoraphobia (fear of leaving the house) is kicking in and I am afraid to drive today.

Can't come in today, the springs on the garage door broke and I can't get the car out cause the door won't open.

Sorry Boss I can't come into work today...my spirit guide says work is for losers!

There has been an urgent family emergency, which I can't talk about lest I endanger any innocent bystanders.

I can't come into work today because of eye trouble.... I can't see working today.

I can't come in to work today because I'll be stalking my previous boss, who fired me for not showing up for work. OK?

When I got up this morning, I took two Ex-lax in addition to my Prozac. I can't get off the john, but I feel good about it.

My mother-in-law has come back as one of the Undead and we must track her to her coffin to drive a stake through her heart and give her eternal peace. One day should do it.

I can't come to work today because the EPA has determined that my house is completely surrounded by wetlands and I have to arrange for helicopter transportation.

I am converting my calendar from Julian to Gregorian.