Saturday, 22 June 2013

How many … to change a light bulb - Page 1

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's not funny, pig. 

How many help-desk employees does it take to change a light bulb? May I suggest you read the manual? 

How many stockbrokers does it take to change a light bulb? Oh, no! The bulb's out? Sell my GE stock NOW!! 

How many New Yorkers does it take to change a light bulb? Hey, buddy, if you keep buggin' me, I'm gonna rip you a new one!

How many men does it take to change a light bulb? None, let her do the dishes in the dark.

How many telemarketers does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but they have to do it while you're eating dinner. 

How many NASCAR drivers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, they can only go left.

How many Valley Girls does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to get an Evian, and one to call Daddy. 

How many reference librarians does it take to change a light bulb? I don't know, I'll have to check on that and get back to you. 

How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb? None, that's a hardware problem. 

How many mathematicians does it take to change a light bulb? Approximately 1.000000000000000000001. 

How many dieters does it take to change a light bulb? If it's "light", what could be better?

How many Blackberry users does it take to change a light bulb? Farm. 

How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? The bicycle's broken. 

How many lesbians does it take to screw in a light bulb? Five, one to change it and four to make the documentary about it. 

How many prisoners does it take to change a light bulb? How many packs of cigarettes will you give them? 

How many editors does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but first he has to rewire the entire building. 

How many mutants does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two thirds. 

How many optimists does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, they're convinced that the power will come back on soon. 

How many chiropractors does it take to change a light bulb? One, but it takes them three visits. 

How many George Bushes does it take to change a light bulb? Well, first of all, the light bulb did nothing wrong. Why do you hate freedom?

How many Spaniards does it take to change a light bulb? Juan.

How many jewish mothers does it take to change a light bulb? Don't worry, I'll just sit here in the dark.

How many women with PMS does it take to change a light bulb? Six. Why? IT JUST DOES, OKAY??!! 


How many statisticians does it take to change a light bulb? 1.67